Priorities!

My poor and neglected blog...I really try to keep up with it but it's almost as if 'what's the point' if nobody is even reading it? But, regardless of that it is cathartic for me to sit and write whatever is going on in my noggin from day to day. So, for that alone, I keep plugging away at it. This whole thing brings me to my point as I know I do have one..what was it again? Oh yeah..priorities! I have been having this very discussion with many of my fellow etsians lately. We all consider ourselves artists. With that we all seem to lack a bit in the priority category. It comes with the territory I think. After all, that is why we want to be artists..so we don't have to deal with the conventional day to day priority grind. If we are slacking off in any way then we reserve the right to call it creative 'thinking' instead of what it really is..slacking! Far too many of us lately have devoted way too much time on various websites like flickr and the etsy forums doing anything but creating! But, as artists trying to sell our wares, we instead call it 'promoting'..instead of what it really is and that is just a bunch of women shooting the shit so to speak. Yes, it's true that spending some time on these sites in a promotion capacity is beneficial to our shops, crafts, sales and bottom lines but...and a big one here...is that these cyber meeting places can suck the hours out of every day if we do not prioritize our time! In all good conscience I have sworn to myself that I will put myself on some sort of schedule. I will devote certain times of the day to promoting..some for just creating..some for ideas..some for listing etc...but it never seems to work for me. I am one of the biggest procrastinators I know so a schedule for someone like me is almost taboo. Plus, there is no one here in the day to give me that push I so need..but I also like not having anyone here nor do I like being pushed in any capacity. So you can see my conundrum...I have put myself on a figurative carousel of hell..all the while spinning around in a self-induced whirlwind of guilt over not having the discipline to keep myself on any schedule let alone a prioritizing one! Someone stop the ride, please! The one big problem I am finding with having an etsy shop and being able to be home to create the items to put and sell in that shop is that I really do enjoy it all. I just need to find that happy medium between it all. I like being home void of people and conversation and all the craziness associated with a regular 9-5. I love being available at a moments notice for the dog or the kids. I like working in my pj's if I so choose! The worry about it all going away if I don't get it all together and soon is what continues to fuel all my feelings of guilt over having priorities...If only I could sell that on etsy! I know a lot of people wo'd buy that! So, I am going to give myself some good advice..whether or not I follow it is a whole other blog entry..I find for myself that if I write things down..a grocery list, a list of things to do..that need to be done etc..is when I am the most productive. There isn't much better that being able to have a list and then being able to cross things off of that list! It's such a feeling of completion..My 'list' will be for a schedule of time...and what I need to get done within that time....kind of like those class schedules we had in school. We knew where we had to be at such and such time..how much of our time needed to be devoted to that block of time and what was required of us within that block. So if I have to treat myself like a junior high student for awhile..then so be it! I will keep you..me..abreast of my progress. If I do not write another entry for some time then that only means my method for prioritizing has succeeded! So that's my rant for this day..other than this issue all else seems to be going well in the life of craziness. My parents will be here soon and I still have a very long list (only a mental one thus far!) of things that need to be done around this house before they arrive! They put no pressure on my home being clean or perfect in any way but you know how it is when anyone visits, let alone your parents...The house needs to be uber clean and all those odds and ends that are yet to be finished needs to get done. The 'rents don't get this way often and it will be the first time they see our new home so...well..you know what I mean...just not enough hours in the day is there?

Spring has Sprung!

It was a gorgeous day! The weather was picture perfect. I truly believe that we here in New England are finally on the other side of Winter and have slowly and gently moved into Spring. I saw my first close up of a Cardinal the other morning. He was breathtaking..I think I saw one from afar early last week but I can't be certain. This little guy was up close and personal. I caught a glimpse of him in an unbudded bush of of my backyard deck. At first I was only able to see the side of him which was a deep brownish red with almost a pearlescent glow about his feathers. Suddenly he turned towards me and it nearly took my breath away. There is no shade of red sufficient enough to describe his coloring. It is one of those moments where you realize what you are seeing is such a gift. His red breast proudly puffing itself out in a stance that I can only call majestic..almost regal in stature. I am of course assuming that it was a male Cardinal. I assume this because it seems that most beautifully vibrant colored birds tend to be of the male persuasion. All of this grandure of course, is meant to attract the female species. Well not sure about our fowl feathered female counterparts but it worked for me! If only it could be that way for all of us ladies. Have the males be the ones who need to fuss over their appearance while we can remain plain in every way possible. Would be nice. We all could learn a thing or two as well from those male penguins and sea horses who have gone a step further to actually birth and/or take care of the little ones like a mother would do...if only, but I digress here..back to Spring. Hubby and I took full advantage of the perfect weather today and began projects on our 'honey do' list! We spent much of the afternoon painting the trim on the exterior of the house. Never having owned a house before we could not wait for the good weather to arrive so that we could finally do all of those homeowner things..puttering around the house..creating great curb appeal..raking and what have you. I think after today I've come to the conclusion that all those things are much better in theory and thought! It was all I could do to keep my mind off of my current needle felting project and try to focus and enjoy painting the house...it was a stretch! This in no way changes my appreciation for the house and all that we are happy and lucky to have it's is merely the understanding that work is work! You can dress it up, wrap it, call it something completely different all you want but bottom line is it's work! But thinking back on the day's events I can be nothing but happy because I actually ow a home that I can paint and with that I have a beautiful backyard that my dog can romp around in at her leisure and my kids can finally have more that one friend over at a time if they so choose....and the weather, well, I remember a few short weeks ago just wishing, wanting, hoping for the endless mounds of snow that had taken over our outdoor space to disappear so that we could enjoy outside. There isn't even a small glimpse of these piles of slush ever having been on our lawn so for that I can't be unhappy! Dare I say I am grateful? Absolutely! My parents will be visiting us in a few short weeks. They are arriving from Seattle and they will have a chance to see our new house. I know they'll love it and appreciate all of the nature and space we have carved out for ourselves. (never seems to matter what age you get to be..having your parents approval will always be an important priority!) The best part of them coming is of course our getting to see them and spend some time with them as we only get to visit with them once a year or so if we're lucky. But the visit is two-fold for me as far as what is the best part. Becasue they are coming to our home and will be staying with us for some of their time here this gives me that kick in the ass motivation I have so needed. All the loose ends of unfinished tasks and projects will finally get done becuase I want them to see what I have been envisioning and that has to include those things to be physically finished. That sense of accomplishemnt will go a long way over the next few weeks. I do have a suspicion that some of my crafting projects will have to go by the wayside a bit though. I have been staying up 'til all hours of the night to stay caught up but I don't think that can continue much longer as I am getting very tired and bitchy I've been told..So, I'll enjoy what I can and when I can and be sure to remember the process behind all of this work and remember to enjoy it along the way and the weather too!

There's hope yet!

Hi all..or most likely..hi me! How do I get people to visit my blog??? Is it even important anyway? Not sure on either but it is cathartic to write even if it is for just myself! I was sitting here taking a break from needle felting and gazed out the patio slider into my backyard..There is NO snow left on the ground. WOW! I forgot just how big the backyard was..it's like a whole new world..an extension of my home...I've noticed tiny little buds of the impending spring....the trees, the flowers and even the grass..all starting to grow. I love spring for that alone. There is something to be said for new life..it is hopeful. Even small bursts of sunshine that peak out between the clouds..makes me happy. How can anyone be blue when spring is arriving? It makes me feel so guilty if I am feeling down on a picture perfect day..It's just unnecessary. What could possibly be that bad that one can't stop for just a moment to revel in the miracle and beauty of what spring is? Those flowers you planted last season..the ones that have been covered for months in mounds of snow and ice..are now slowly spurting up from that very ground to take a peak at the world...it amazes me that they even survive! Just stop and think for a minute at the actual odds of this...survival, birth and rebirth...it is miraculous and we all need to take a moment out of our hectic lives to really enjoy the wonderment of it all...but then just as quickly we need to get back to work! Until another sun-soaked morning..enjoy all that life is offering us and I promise to remember to do the same..

Mutha'Hood

Well folks..today is a day to put in the books! You know the books? The mental book all of us mothers have that we store in the very back of our brain? That part of our brains that we use to recall wonderful life moments as a parent? Well, since my parenting has graduated into teenagerdome....that area of my brain has been replaced with moments of not so good parent memories. I used to use that part of my cranium to draw upon pleasant moments when an otherwise pleasant parenting day has gone awry...You know..the day your kid says that they hate you...you quickly scatter to that place in your head that is overflowing with cute and proud mommy/kid moments...then you take a deep breath, sigh and let it all out...'This is jsut one moment in time and everyone says it's normal for a teenager to react to their parents in such a negative way". So fine..I let go of the heated minute of spewing sadness and reflect on the times when I was everything to my children. But lately the negative has far outweighed the positive and that area of my lid is now full and busting with those 'un' words! UNhappy, UNbelievable, UNsatisfactory, UNgrateful, UNfair, UNknown, UNfamiliar..and so on...Gone are the days of being able to pull from those thoughts any and all happy cheerful and cute moments. Today was a day to beat all days..a less than proud moment in a parents life. I won't say a parents worse nightmare because I can think of many more horrible ideas to put into that category..but I will say that I will not be adding a new page in my scrapbook life! I had to attend juvenille court with my almost 16 year old son today! Not a fun nor amusing place to be. It wasn't extremely serious but enough so to where we needed to attend. The problem is that my darling sweet little boy has not yet learned the art of brevity! You know..learning to keep one's mouth shut..ending that outloud thought BEFORE you go too far with it...Well that will get each and every one of us in trouble every time! We're all guilty of it but in this day and age..due to all of the problems that have gone on in our high schools with unhappy teens 'getting back' at those who have wronged them...well kids just aren't allowed to say anything anymore. And rightfully so..who are we to decide and to be able to judge if and when a kid is serious or not with their words. Nothing anymore can be left to chance..Sad at the same time too...but it's for the safety of everyone. My son needs and needed to learn the reprocussions of his actions and words. So for that it was a blessing in some small way for him to realize the seriousness of this and to accept responsibility for his actions. There is something so real and final when these words come from a legal standpoint as opposed to my son hearing those same words from me..after all, I'm just his mother...So let's hope that this was the first and last time that I as his loving mother will have to ever be in this position again! For my own sake I do hope that I shall again be able to call upon those wonderful mother memories to replace these not so good ones..and that my son will realize what all of this actually does to everyone else around him and not just him..all I can say is that he is soooo very lucky that he is cute!

COMPARTMENTS!

Is anyone else having trouble staying on task these days? I sure am. I blame it all on the weather. It isn't winter anymore but it definately can't be called spring either! It is seasonal limbo!! A pergatory of impending precipitation if you will! Should I put away all of those heavy sweaters and sweatshirts? How 'bout the UGGS? Can I safely assume that my shelfed Crocs are ready, willing and able to get into the footwear rotation? On a side note here..many a dedicated Ugg and Croc wearer (and they seem to go hand-in-hand!) swear that either can be worn through every season...but I BEG to differ...Have you ever seen how ridiculous a pair of Uggs actually looks with a short skirt in the middle of the summer? Or for that matter, a pair of Uggs with a short skirt in the winter..kinda' redundant? Or the worse of the two shoe faux paus are the Crocs in the winter snow!! For Chr*st's sake people..they have holes in them and are made of plastic!! If I have to hear one more time how 'waterproof' they are..I think I'll end it. They have HOLES in them!! No amount of Mickey and Friends covers are going to plug the holes enough for water and snow to not get on your fett..or worse yet..your socks if you are actually dumb enough to wear them with socks! You might as well just pack it in and move to an over 55 timeshare in Florida and get used to eating dinner at 4 pm! I may have gotten off subject a bit here..now where was I? Oh yeah...having trouble focusing....and blaming the weather...my immediate thoughts go to those who create Waldorf inspired season dolls...another year without a real spring and those dolls will be sporting a turtleneck with a pair of Bermuda shorts! For those of you who will get this next dry-humored joke...another year without a spring and James Taylor will be there more than you'll want him to be...."Winter..blank..Summer or FAll"..all ya have to do is.... anywho...the lack of any real resemblance of new life..budding leaves..peaking crocuses...chirping birds..buzzing bees..lulling breezes and spring will just be a thing of the past...Because of this I can't seem to begin and end anywhere...in my home...with my crafts..getting organized in any fashion whatsoever. There is something to be said for the phrase "spring cleaning"..this in itself represents a new time, a starting over, a refreshing moment and a get organized attitude..It is all wrapped up in that slight sweet, clean, fresh-smelling breeze associated with the season..It is renewing and without it..another crusty, stale and deadening day void of any rejuvination and motivation...For the love of Pete..there is still mounds of snow in my yard!! I just want..well I need to know..when..when...when...at this point I'd be willing to settle for 45 degrees with a hint of sun...until then everything will suffer..and that's how I see it..

"Did you say PARK? Or was it TREAT?"

baby Gracie 2, originally uploaded by Thinkoutsidethebox2008.

Gracie giving her best..'what was that you said' face...I love her more and more...